


The Story of How I Thought We Could Be

by shopfront



Category: Pretty Little Liars
Genre: Backstory, Community: femslash11, Crush, F/F, Lingerie, Minor Character(s), Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-20
Updated: 2011-08-20
Packaged: 2017-10-22 21:03:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/242561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shopfront/pseuds/shopfront
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The history of the white La Perla.  <em>Blinking innocently, Mona dropped her eyes and surveyed her own body. Bra and panties firmly in place: check. Sheer negligee artfully draped over the top: double check. “What, this old thing?”</em></p>
            </blockquote>





	The Story of How I Thought We Could Be

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).



When she first tried on the La Perla, Mona thought of Hanna.

It wasn't deliberate or anything, god. It was just, like, a flash in her mind. It was also… a little intoxicating; just a simple memory of Hanna with a particularly wide smile, but it made so many things suddenly super intense.

The first thing she noticed was the scratch of the lace against her skin.

Then the weight of her breast in her hand as she tugged the top edge of the cup into place.

When she noticed her ribcage expanding and contracting against the band of the bra, she clapped a hand over her mouth and struggled to bring herself back to even breathing.

Mona didn’t really have to think about the decision after that. When she got her first opportunity to stay over at Hanna’s, the La Perla was the first item she popped into her bag. Unworn.

* * *

“God, Mona, how do you even sleep in that?”

Blinking innocently, Mona dropped her eyes and surveyed her own body. Bra and panties firmly in place: check. Sheer negligee artfully draped over the top: double check. “What, this old thing?”

“No seriously, I don’t know anybody else who can sleep in expensive lingerie. Aren’t you worried you’ll rip it, or that it’ll get uncomfortable?”

Hanna had been spread across the end of her bed when Mona walked in, flat on her stomach with her pajama top creeping up. Mona considered it some god somewhere graciously allowing her a split second to admire the curve of Hanna’s lower back before she could notice. But now Hanna was pushing off the mattress. Brow furrowed and lips pursed, she looked Mona up and down, confusion painted along every line of her face and body.

Mona swallowed hard and tried to suppress a shiver.

“Nope,” she returned, voice carefully casual but inside she let herself crow a little as Hanna’s eyes followed her all the way to the bed. When she reached it she tucked her feet under her and let a little of that satisfaction sneak into her grin, “so, what do we want to do tonight?”

All the lace and sheer effects might have seemed decidedly less impressive in the morning after being rumpled by sleep, but it didn’t matter. Mona slipped off for an early shower and blow dry before Hanna even stirred.

* * *

The next time Hanna invited Mona to stay the night, Mona said no. She almost crumbled when Hanna recoiled, hurt, but there wasn’t any notice. Mona didn’t have time to go home and pack, and she just didn’t tough through a night without her own stuff, not for anyone. Not even Hanna.

Besides, a little voice reminded her, there was a La Perla carefully tucked into the back of her underwear drawer that she needed to fetch first.

* * *

“Hey, you don’t mind if I just sleep in here, right? I _so_ can’t sleep on the floor though, it’ll totally ruin my hair.”

“Oh, I- I thought you’d want the guest room. It’s a bit more quiet for you that way.” Hanna’s hand jumped up and then froze, fluttering mid-air, as she spoke.

“Don’t be silly,” Mona said, and when that made Hanna frown she reached out to take her hand.

“I just thought-”

“And I appreciate it. Really, Hanna, you’re so thoughtful,” Mona’s fingers ran up the back of Hanna’s hands and pressed gently, rocking them back and forth a little, almost a caress. “But I just fell asleep in here last time so it seems silly. Besides, we’re besties now right?”

Hanna’s smile brightened at that and they both relaxed. So much so, in fact, that Mona nearly forgot to go and change. Nearly.

Dragging herself away from the movie was totally worth Hanna exclaiming over her choice of sleepwear again, though.

* * *

It made an appearance more frequently after that. It. Mona couldn’t bring herself to call it her La Perla anymore, because then she’d have to face the reason why she’d bought such beautiful lingerie but wasn’t wearing it more. Wasn’t even wearing it on dates.

Which was silly, really, because it held her in all the right ways and made her look amazing. Well, more amazing than usual, if that was possible.

But everytime Mona’s fingers wandered to the back of the drawer she hesitated. Some things should be sacred, right? A secret little symbol to herself about her priorities. Namely Hanna and popularity, and luckily for Mona they were two things that went hand in hand now.

Besides, all those times she took it out and wore it while she was home alone and thinking about Hanna totally didn’t count…

* * *

To call ‘pulling Hanna’s ripcord’ hard was _the_ most massive understatement of the century, as far as Mona was concerned. To say she didn’t lose sleep over it would be a lie, but hard decisions had to be made.

The first hard decision had been to make herself as fearless as Hanna. Actually being popular? It came easily after that.

Realising that she needed to be fearless _without_ Hanna, though, that was so much worse.

But Mona did it, because she was tough. All those nasty words she used to hear, they’d made her strong and strong-Mona knew what her priorities were and made the hard calls.

* * *

She still cried when she wrapped the La Perla in tissue paper and moved it to the top shelf of her closet, though. But her tears were hardest when she moved it back the next day. Great big furious, terrified tears that she thought she could drown in if she wanted to.

When she went to the hospital, Mona just grabbed the bra and shoved it in her bag. There was no ceremony, no care, and most especially no protective tissue lined box to place between layers of clothes.

Mona had broken something.

It was stupid and deliberate, and it was all her own fault and she was going to make sure she never made that mistake again, but first….

First, Mona had something to mend.


End file.
